the lamest prayer ever!

last night as i was lying awake in bed, unable to sleep thinking about all the things in the previous post, i prayed one simple prayer...

"Daddy," i said,  "please just help me to do something i can be proud of."

...and this is when He winked at me as if to say, "and this is where we'll begin, leslie."

good grief.  if i've never really understood why that wise and faithful Father of mine hates pride i do now.  

so we're working on bringing my heart to a point of caring nothing of myself and only of His glory.  somehow i have this feeling that that's really what it's all about.

to the One who has the power to heal

do you ever feel completely overwhelmed by the evil in the world, and desperately want to do something to help?  ...the kidnapped children trained to be soldiers, the aborted babies with no voice to cry for help, the millions of orphaned children, the raped women who are treated as outcasts...the list goes on and on.

and then when you feel like your heart just can't take anymore, while sipping a chai tea latte in panera (i thought i'd throw in a little irony for you), you get pummeled with the reality that all of the hatred, the selfishness, the stupidity and jealousy and short sightedness that is at the root of all the pain in this world, is alive in...you!  it's a hard realization to come to.

Lord, it's so easy for me to want to heal the pain that plagues this world i live in.  but help me to see the wickedness in my own heart and let You, the only One who can heal, take over.  i can't help on my own.  all my efforts, all my good intentions, all my hard work would be completely useless if i don't let You do the fixing.  because the evil i see in the world, is in me too, so how do i expect to have any power over it on my own?  oh Daddy!  fill me with You so i can make some sort of difference in this heart-sick place called earth.

God bless the cold...but only when there's heat!

what do you think these things have in common?

-things you wear to play in the snow, you say? no, i don't think so

-great fashion statements? hmmm...not quite.

-how about what is completely necessary to cover yourself with when sitting on your couch or bed under four blankets drinking hot chocolate or hot coffee or hot tea or hot water for that matter...anything to shake the cold? by jove, i think we have a winner!

yes, i'm afraid it's true. this tuesday, after what seemed like years of 0 degree nights (tiny exaggeration) we finally received heat! but up until that moment we spent our evenings huddled under our covers with hats gloves and (callie)3 sweatshirts, yelling to each other from our rooms so we could have some sort of conversation without freezing to death!

when i called nicor to say, "we have no GAS!" they calmly sent me jumping through hoops, cut off my desperate please with robotic tones of "hold on ma'am, let me look at your account" and refused to send someone to help us until just this week when, of course, it's too warm too need heat. in the words of rebekah and her mother, "honest to pete!" (i like that saying. it's almost as good as 'holy monkeys')

i told callie we should take a picture of us in our pathetic state to remember it for always, and she replied with horror in her eyes, "i'm not taking a picture looking like this!" (fyi: cold apartments make for very tired, disheveled looking roommates)

maybe someday i'll talk her into striking a pose for old time's sake, though right now it may be too soon to bring up such a bitter memory. but if she ever yields, you can bet it'll be posted here for all to see!

in the spirit of the season, let's all be reminded to give thanks for the many blessing we have...like HEAT!