i didn' know i could cry that hard

last night i finished reading 'anne of green gables' and just in the nick of time. one of my many resolutions this year is to read a book a month, which shouldn't be so hard but i just always seem to waste my time, plus....you guessed it...i'm slow.

anyhow, i've been wanting to read this particular book for years because the movies are so great. i was looking through my parent's bookshelf and found the prettiest copy i've ever seen and since i always judge a book by it's cover (i mean that only in the literal sense...not about people...although if i'm honest there have been times when i've done that too...shhh!) i knew i had to read it even if i hadn't wanted to for so long.

i simply loved every minute of this heart warming, thought provoking look into an extraordinary little girl's mind. i found myself laughing out loud quite a few times. but the height of all emotional influences of this book hit me at about 2am this morning when i was quickly trying to make my monthly deadline...technically late, i know, but i like to think the next day doesn't really start until after you wake up.

(for those of you who have never read or seen 'anne of green gables' and really want to without having any details spoiled, proceed no further. but i'm pretty sure all of you have at least seen it and are as big of fans as i am.)

this great surge of emotion was inflicted from the very well known scene where matthew dies, leaving anne with those precious words, "i never wanted a boy. i only wanted you, my anne. my girl." ooh, just writing it now about brings me to tears. as i read of the tragic death of matthew cuthbert i was flooded with this overwhelming urge to bawl...which happens often in books, but is always controlled to a sufficient amount of tears and scrunched up facial expression, as was the case here.

however, as i read on i began to lose all control and soon my tears and wrinkled expression compiled with an abundance of sobs and a quivering lower lip. i couldn't stop! i kept thinking, "leslie, you know this story. it's no surprise. get a grip!" but alas no grip came. for a solid 5 minutes i cried so hard i was afraid my roommates might hear me through the air vents two stories up! oh, matthew!

so this morning i was thinking through my previous emotional state and trying to find some justification in it. i told my roomy, holly, about it and she responded with an all too gracious, "i think it's a gift that you can feel that much for characters and relate in such a personal way that it moves you to tears. i never do that."

thanks for the encouragement, holly, but i'm prone to believe i'm just mentally unstable.