when i had malaria (yes it's true. a few weeks ago my initiation into the african culture was complete. at least i hope so. i had the blessing of getting malaria and a parasite all in the same week. sweet.) i had some pretty amazing experiences.
like for instance, i found myself at one point best friends with holly shiftwell (for those of you who haven't seen cars 2, it kind of rocks) and we experienced some awesome spy-like adventures with the whole cars cast. super cool. was i a car too? well... not sure. but i'm assuming yes, because otherwise this whole story wouldn't make much sense, would it.
another time i was having loads of fun sitting in the front seat of a car watch dogs and other animals fight each other in the back (yes of the car that i was currently sitting in, having a jolly ol' time). how shocked was i when one of the dogs suddenly turned on me after my friend pulled one of the cute little animals out of his mouth.
weird dreams? well... considering i could see my bedroom during their entirety, i like to call them fever induced hallucinations. at least that's what the doctor told me. sweet.
Monday, February 27, 2012
Thursday, February 23, 2012
super hero wannabe
so since becoming a teacher (something i've always stated with conviction that i would never be) here at lifesong, i have learned one very important thing.
teaching is hard.
really hard.
super hero powers required hard.
so here i am, feeling like clarence, waiting to receive my super hero cape (aka: wings), hoping that maybe, just maybe, the next bell that rings will be all for me.
i spent almost an hour this afternoon speaking with a fellow teacher on how she does it. she was talking about how as teachers we need to be neither hard or soft, but firm, so that the children know that it is necessary to respect us (the biggest issue all of us have experienced with these kids), to which i replied, "how in the world do you do that?"
she laughed.
"one thing i know is that as teachers we do as much learning as we do teaching. i used to wonder the same thing, but in time it comes. don't worry. just remember you are learning too." (aka: cut yourself some slack)
in my head i know she's right. but instead my heart (or my stomach, i'm not sure which) keeps telling me that the reality is i'm just failing.
i know that's not true. well, i think it isn't. actually i kind of think it is i just hope it isn't. no, the truth is i do know it's true. how depressing! (exhibit a: my thought process)
but if i stop feeling sorry for myself and stop taking myself too seriously i realize that, yeah, maybe i'm really not doing a great job on my own.
but i'm not supposed to be doing a great job on my own. i'm not capable of doing a great job on my own. i will never reach super hero status. but i do know someone who is already there. and as long as He is walking this dusty african road with me, i guess i don't have too much to worry about.
teaching is hard.
 |
| not accurate |
really hard.
 |
| more accurate |
super hero powers required hard.
so here i am, feeling like clarence, waiting to receive my super hero cape (aka: wings), hoping that maybe, just maybe, the next bell that rings will be all for me.
i spent almost an hour this afternoon speaking with a fellow teacher on how she does it. she was talking about how as teachers we need to be neither hard or soft, but firm, so that the children know that it is necessary to respect us (the biggest issue all of us have experienced with these kids), to which i replied, "how in the world do you do that?"
she laughed.
"one thing i know is that as teachers we do as much learning as we do teaching. i used to wonder the same thing, but in time it comes. don't worry. just remember you are learning too." (aka: cut yourself some slack)
in my head i know she's right. but instead my heart (or my stomach, i'm not sure which) keeps telling me that the reality is i'm just failing.
i know that's not true. well, i think it isn't. actually i kind of think it is i just hope it isn't. no, the truth is i do know it's true. how depressing! (exhibit a: my thought process)
but if i stop feeling sorry for myself and stop taking myself too seriously i realize that, yeah, maybe i'm really not doing a great job on my own.
but i'm not supposed to be doing a great job on my own. i'm not capable of doing a great job on my own. i will never reach super hero status. but i do know someone who is already there. and as long as He is walking this dusty african road with me, i guess i don't have too much to worry about.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
in case you were wondering
my sleep schedule is wack. who's surprised?
(and yes i did just use the work wack. what can i say? i like out of date phraseology. it suits me)
you need an example? okay!
monday night/tuesday morning: up till 3:30am (thanks tam and lisa... that's right. i'm blaming you simply because i can) chatting and trying to remember all the things i needed to get done for the next day
later tuesday morning: up at 7:20am
tuesday evening: dead asleep with no hope of appearing alive for a good long while at 6pm
later tuesday evening: dragging myself out of bed to skype for work at 8pm
tuesday night: get a skype call from my dear and missed aunt at 11pm but lose connecting. fall asleep while waiting to hear back from her only to miss her call
later tuesday night: she calls back at 11:30pm we talk till 12:30am and lose connection again (thankfully this was during our goodbyes)
12:45am: guess who is suddenly wide awake. awesome. i'll just catch up on some light reading
12:50am: guess who is suddenly asleep.
this morning: up at 6:30am to get done stuff that had to get done otherwise i would not have been up anywhere near that time
this current moment: 10:01am can you fall asleep while typing? cause i think i am. thankfully my first class doesn't start until 1:30pm
goodnight... i mean good morning... i mean............. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
(and yes i did just use the work wack. what can i say? i like out of date phraseology. it suits me)
you need an example? okay!
monday night/tuesday morning: up till 3:30am (thanks tam and lisa... that's right. i'm blaming you simply because i can) chatting and trying to remember all the things i needed to get done for the next day
later tuesday morning: up at 7:20am
tuesday evening: dead asleep with no hope of appearing alive for a good long while at 6pm
later tuesday evening: dragging myself out of bed to skype for work at 8pm
tuesday night: get a skype call from my dear and missed aunt at 11pm but lose connecting. fall asleep while waiting to hear back from her only to miss her call
later tuesday night: she calls back at 11:30pm we talk till 12:30am and lose connection again (thankfully this was during our goodbyes)
12:45am: guess who is suddenly wide awake. awesome. i'll just catch up on some light reading
12:50am: guess who is suddenly asleep.
this morning: up at 6:30am to get done stuff that had to get done otherwise i would not have been up anywhere near that time
this current moment: 10:01am can you fall asleep while typing? cause i think i am. thankfully my first class doesn't start until 1:30pm
goodnight... i mean good morning... i mean............. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Monday, February 20, 2012
like a child
today as i was leaving school at 6pm one of the grade 6 boys ran out off the guys' house (which is on campus) and asked me for a ride. i said jump in but hurry. truth be told, i was super ready to get home and fall onto my bed and was afraid the other boys (that were currently in the house) would see him getting in my car and run out, make me wait so they could all get rides. such a loving, selfless reaction i know.
sometimes i laugh at myself... how i rush to sneak kids in and out of my house/car before others see and want in on the fun. i feel the same kind of panic i had as a kid, frantically eating as much candy as possible before my mom caught me
as we drove off (at a much higher speed than necessary) he laughed and hooted and hollered because he was so proud that he got a ride and they did not. he said how earlier they had all gotten rides with mitzi and he had to walk. now he was no less than elated at the thought the he (and only he) got to ride with me while the others would inevitably have to walk home.
it made me laugh. and i thought to myself, as much as i sometimes get frustrated by the childishness that goes on at school, there's nothing quite as grand as that childlike spirit that finds pure pleasure in some of the simplest things.
sometimes i laugh at myself... how i rush to sneak kids in and out of my house/car before others see and want in on the fun. i feel the same kind of panic i had as a kid, frantically eating as much candy as possible before my mom caught me
as we drove off (at a much higher speed than necessary) he laughed and hooted and hollered because he was so proud that he got a ride and they did not. he said how earlier they had all gotten rides with mitzi and he had to walk. now he was no less than elated at the thought the he (and only he) got to ride with me while the others would inevitably have to walk home.
it made me laugh. and i thought to myself, as much as i sometimes get frustrated by the childishness that goes on at school, there's nothing quite as grand as that childlike spirit that finds pure pleasure in some of the simplest things.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
a beheaded chicken...
that's what i feel like. we're on the verge of big stuff my friends... big stuff. i'm super excited and crazy busy and ready to scream with delight and run away in terror at any given moment.
i'm not sure if i can give the particulars right now so i'm going to wait until i know for sure, but just keep us in your prayers. details will come.
in the mean time sit tight and i'll continue running around like a crazy.
today i spent an hour and a half teaching my huge art class of 5 boys how to do a live painting that we're going to incorporate into our easter play. it was fun, cool, and exhausting all at the same time. they had a fit any time something dripped and i said, "boys! stop worrying about the drips! i'm telling you now drips are cool." to which they replied "awe (no)! drips are messy and not good."
so this piece that's supposed to be started and completed in a matter of minutes may end up taking nothing short of an hour to finish. the audience will be asleep by the end of it and the song will be long over.
i told them, "when you paint this, the audience is not going to be thinking, 'hmm... how accurate is that hand.' 'is that head proportionate to the body?' the point is not to have a perfect drawing but to tell a story and give the audience simple images that will inspire that story in their mind. don't try to be perfect."
we'll see if it works.
you will see if it works, too, when i post the video of the play in oh... you know... a few months. let's be honest, i mean really.
i'm not sure if i can give the particulars right now so i'm going to wait until i know for sure, but just keep us in your prayers. details will come.
in the mean time sit tight and i'll continue running around like a crazy.
today i spent an hour and a half teaching my huge art class of 5 boys how to do a live painting that we're going to incorporate into our easter play. it was fun, cool, and exhausting all at the same time. they had a fit any time something dripped and i said, "boys! stop worrying about the drips! i'm telling you now drips are cool." to which they replied "awe (no)! drips are messy and not good."
so this piece that's supposed to be started and completed in a matter of minutes may end up taking nothing short of an hour to finish. the audience will be asleep by the end of it and the song will be long over.
i told them, "when you paint this, the audience is not going to be thinking, 'hmm... how accurate is that hand.' 'is that head proportionate to the body?' the point is not to have a perfect drawing but to tell a story and give the audience simple images that will inspire that story in their mind. don't try to be perfect."
we'll see if it works.
you will see if it works, too, when i post the video of the play in oh... you know... a few months. let's be honest, i mean really.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
never underestimate the power of a good book
after a day of "auditioning" kids, teaching music class, running lines with my drama stars, making several unsuccessful attempts of getting in contact with the embassy (i mean seriously. what are they here for?), and having boys tell me that i'm not fair and they don't like me when i am too tired to play with them after school (to which i must admit i kind of laugh at... i'm terrible, i know), i curled up on my sofa, chatted with my parents (who mocked me with their condo lanai and perfect florida weather) and my sisters (who's locations where not quite as enticing, though missed deeply), and then spent the rest of my evening with my old friends in mitford.
is that seriously only one sentence? whoa.
in high school i first started reading jan karon's mitford series and fell in deep love with the characters of this beloved, quaint, and quirky town. for christmas my mom sent me the first book on radio theater put on by focus on the family, and just like pavlov's dogs i began to salivate over the thought of reading the rest of the series. so low and behold this week i received a care package by mom (she's a good one) with book #2! my heart is happy.
Friday, February 10, 2012
just typing
hanging around school after hours is probably one of my favorite things to do. most of the kids have left and those who have stuck around are either playing futbol, cleaning classrooms, or just hanging out. it's laid back and peaceful and i love it.
it's also when i feel like i get the most "connect" time with the kids. we're able to sit and talk or run through lines for the play or sing songs we've been learning. it's fun.
i've never been very good in the midst of human chaos. most anyone who knows me knows that being surrounded my a lot of people will almost always majorly overwhelm me. (this does not include events like concerts or games... cause those are fun) it's during these times that i tend to get irritable and snappy.
unfortunately when you're in the business of working at a school with over 200 students human chaos quickly becomes a consistent part of life. i'm trying to learn to deal with it with grace. i don't always succeed but it's a learning process. a process that i'm trying to give myself grace through as well. something i've never been terribly good at.
but more than anything, this is why after school hours at school are cherished. the children are few. the conversation is meaningful... or at least personal. and i don't feel like i'm doing quite as badly at this whole living-in-africa thing as i usually do.
praise the Lord for moments like these.
*so i wasn't sure what i was going to write but decided i needed to actually update this thing and writer's block was just going to have to get over itself for tonight. so i started typing and this was what came out. take it however you like.
it's also when i feel like i get the most "connect" time with the kids. we're able to sit and talk or run through lines for the play or sing songs we've been learning. it's fun.
i've never been very good in the midst of human chaos. most anyone who knows me knows that being surrounded my a lot of people will almost always majorly overwhelm me. (this does not include events like concerts or games... cause those are fun) it's during these times that i tend to get irritable and snappy.
unfortunately when you're in the business of working at a school with over 200 students human chaos quickly becomes a consistent part of life. i'm trying to learn to deal with it with grace. i don't always succeed but it's a learning process. a process that i'm trying to give myself grace through as well. something i've never been terribly good at.
but more than anything, this is why after school hours at school are cherished. the children are few. the conversation is meaningful... or at least personal. and i don't feel like i'm doing quite as badly at this whole living-in-africa thing as i usually do.
praise the Lord for moments like these.
*so i wasn't sure what i was going to write but decided i needed to actually update this thing and writer's block was just going to have to get over itself for tonight. so i started typing and this was what came out. take it however you like.
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